HIS Mercy and Grace is New Every Day, Hour, Minute, Second, Instant

I’ve hated this man. I’ve not loved him at full capacity. I’ve fed him lies & told him he wasn’t good enough and have allowed others to tell him he wasn’t good enough. He has been broken. He has allowed others to treat him disrespectfully. He has run through brick walls & battle for others who won’t even stand up for him. He couldn’t stop individuals from abandoning him, yet I’ve seen him get up and stand to be a light to the world & love others despite all that. He has stood paralyzed by fear while he fought battles in his mind, heart and soul.

This man has screwed up many times, as a son, husband, father, nephew, boyfriend, cousin, friend, Brother and leader because he doesn’t always say or do the “right things”. He has secrets. He has scars… because he has a history.

Some people love this man, some like him, and some people don’t care for him at all. He has done good in his life. He has done bad in his life. He is random and sometimes silly. He is who he is.

You can love him or not. But if he loves you, he will do it with his whole heart, and he will make no apologies for the way he is.

This man is a WARRIOR & A SURVIVOR. He’s not perfect but he has a lot of WORTH!

If you have not read The Double-Edged Sword, buy it here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0924NDQ3J

#itsokaytobebroken #smashthestigma #endthestigma #ptsdawareness #ptsdrecovery #PTSD #ptsdwarrior #resilience #strength #posttraumaticgrowth #healing #nofear #firstresponders #firefighters #lawenforcement #EMS #dispatcher #veterans #unresolvedtrauma #mentalhealthawareness #suicideprevention


“Anybody who comes into this job is brought up by a team of providers who will help to educate, train, and make the provider a better version of themself. Everyone we encounter has something to offer us. As you build on the educational foundation of the job, senior providers will offer you their tips and tricks to offer shortcuts or a more thorough way of documenting or just a different mentality to the overall approach. They’ve experienced things differently and have adapted to their experiences as they have shaped the provider they have ultimately become. In much the same way, I believe that everybody we contact in our lives is put there with a purpose as well. I believe this theory applies to all aspects of our lives regardless of the faction people label themselves into. In the emergency services, we adapt pieces of our partners to ourselves and to the type of clinician we will ultimately become.” –Christopher Turnbull, Author “The Double-Edged Sword” Buy the book here https://www.amazon.com/Double-Edged-Sword…/dp/B0924NDQ3J


Continuing Education Opportunity


Join me on August 8th at 7pm ET for 2.0 CEUs. This is the course I created after writing the book, The Double-Edged Sword. The lecture highlights all the unintentional lessons learned over the course of my career. I’m looking forward to a fun evening. Follow the link to sign up. #suicideawareness #emslife #worklifebalance #workhomebalance #dontgiveup #stress #mentalhealth #workculture #zoom #continuingeducation

Don’t Even Think About It

“I am genuinely appreciative when somebody recognizes us for the job we have and takes just a second to say a quick little cliché to remind us that we aren’t invisible.  But there is a dark side occasionally that presents.  

‘What is the worst thing you have ever seen?’

I don’t care if it’s your first day or you’re reading this after retirement, you know what the worst call of your career was.  You flash to that scene when you encounter a certain smell.  You have the same day every year that is an anniversary you’d rather do without.  You pass that intersection, house, nursing home, bridge, landmark, whatever the setting was; and you remember every detail of that moment.  You remember how you felt.  You remember how bad you were tested.  You remember who your first phone call was to and probably the entire transcript of that conversation.  

So no, I don’t answer this inquiry from the public.  I like to respond ‘my paycheck’ and then turn and walk away.  I don’t understand why people don’t think about the impact of a question like that.  To me, it’s the equivalent of asking a military veteran if he ever killed anybody.  In both cases, we’re not proud of those moments.  My advice to anybody in EMS who has that bad call that will stick with them for the rest of their life is to come up with a quick remark as an abrupt end to a conversation that never should have started.” –Christopher Turnbull, The Double-Edged Sword (book available on Amazon and Google Books)

Like the Facebook Page “The Double-Edged Sword”

#dontdwell #ptsd #mentalhealth #publicjustdontunderstand #job #career #worstcall #worstday #stress #emslife #paramedic #firefighter #policeofficer #thedoubleedgedsword #nightmares #despair

Social Media, Take 2

It has been over a year and a half since I said goodbye to social media. I found it to be so much negativity in one place, and it was definitely occupying way too much of my time. So in December 2020, I got rid of the toxic environment.

However, the reality is that if this book’s sales are going to continue as great as they are, I need to connect to a broader range of customers, so with the use of Facebook and Instagram ads, we are going to get the message out there to a lot more people. My goal still remains to put this book in the hands of the right person at the right time to prevent any further suicides. If I can change just one person’s mind, then I have accomplished what I set out to do by the grace of God. Please find me on Facebook (The Double-Edged Sword) and Instagram (Christurnbull07042021) and follow, like, subscribe, or whatever the latest cool thing is to do. In the meantime, I will be educating myself on all the new features of these platforms and figuring out how to get ads approved.

Happy Anniversary To Me

One year ago yesterday, I publicly gave my life to God, declaring that I am a Jesus follower. My plunge into the baptismal was symbolic of a death to the life that I knew and a rebirth in Christ who strengthens me. And strengthen me he has.

Soon after, much like Jesus, I was tested. Things at work were left uncertain. My role at home was hindered by my inability to shake my work mindset. Bills were behind. Expenses were higher than I was bringing home. And yet, I survived it.

Jesus, himself, was tempted by the devil after his baptism when he set out for isolation in the desert. Jesus was perfect, so of course I struggled throughout my trials. But it was different this time. I was shown grace and mercy and in turn was able to pick up my pieces and drive on. I thank God every day for my church community and pray that you might find your way to a church as well. I don’t mean to brag about Jesus, but if you don’t know Him, I wish you could have just a glimpse of what I’ve discovered.

Pastor Joel Tice in the basement at Bayshore Community Church, Rehoboth Beach, Delaware, US.

A Day in the Life

Cortisol is a steroid hormone that is made naturally in your body.  It is secreted by the adrenal glands located on top of the kidneys.  When we perceive a threat or stressor, our bodies react within seconds to allow us to handle the situation or escape to safety.  Although cortisol is best known as a stress hormone, it participates in blood pressure regulation, glucose metabolism, immune function, nutrient metabolism, mental alertness, and provides increased energy.

When cortisol is released during the Fight or Flight response, the body responds by increasing glucose availability to the brain, heart, and large muscles (critical organs in the stress response).

Cortisol secretion varies among individuals. One person may secrete higher levels of cortisol than another, although responding to the same call.

Cortisol is naturally released in higher amounts in the morning and declines throughout the day.  For people who work night shifts, this pattern can reverse. First responders who experience abnormal sleep patterns in the course of a shift can secrete cortisol throughout the day and at night.

While small increases of cortisol have beneficial effects, too much cortisol in the bloodstream can cause a variety of health problems: high blood sugar, anxiety, depression, fatigue, gastrointestinal upset such as constipation, bloating, or diarrhea, increased abdominal fat, diabetes, headache, heart disease, high blood pressure, lowered immunity, decreased inflammatory response, irritability, memory and concentration problems, sleep difficulties, weight gain, and slow recovery from exercise.  Due to the fact that First Responders are subject to increased cortisol release, it is important to be aware of these negative symptoms.

A Higher Power Workout

Men, remember how much fun we had in phys ed in school? We were competitive, we gave it all we had. Then college happened, and some went on to join fraternities with a tight brotherhood mentality. Maybe you went to the military where you rely on each other to work together to execute a mission. But then we got out into the real world. Stress, families, no time to hang out.

I was invited to check out a workout group for men. The concept is Fitness, Fellowship, and Faith (F3). If you’re looking to reignite that phys ed/frat boy/soldier feel and get in shape, check out http://www.f3nation.com for information about your closest workout.

I’m telling you, I fell into something awesome, and I’m just getting started.